11 March 2011

The Horrors: Beautifying for the Big Day

This post was sort of tough to write, so please, be kind Hive. Guys, I have a confession. Ready? Okay, here goes. I pick my eyebrows.

Oh, I do that too you say? No, no, I don't pluck them in the sense that most women pluck their eyebrows. No, I actually pick them. As in, Hello, my name is Miss Candy Apple and I mangle my eyebrows.

Still confused? Let me explain. As far as bad habits go, nail-biting never really appealed to me, but in late grade-school (7th or 8th grade?), for some reason I started pulling my eyelashes. I don't really understand why I started doing it, and I eventually kicked the habit, but then, in highschool, I started in on picking at my eyebrows. Stress, maybe? Honestly, I'm not sure exactly why. It is soothing to me for some reason, and even though consciously I know I shouldn't, I still do it. It relieves my anxiety.

Which is bad. Because wedding planning makes me anxious. So I pick at my eyebrows. Which means that I have patchy eyebrows. But, realizing that I will have patchy eyebrows for the wedding? That makes me anxious too. So I pick at them some more. It's a vicious cycle, a la Le Petit Prince.

In recent years, the eyebrow-picking has focused mainly on the inner-ends of my eyebrows. Those ends have consequently gotten really patchy and ugly; I imagine people think I'm just really terrible at plucking my eyebrows. Sigh. They actually might not even notice. Who knows. But I notice.

I have thought about this problem, and have even done some searches online about it. I honestly thought I was the only person who does this (I am totally weird, right?), but it turns out that a quick google search turns up a LOT of people with this problem. It even has a name? Trichotillomania. (I told Mr. Candy Apple that it has a name, and he was like, stop trying to pretend like it's a real thing. Just stop picking your eyebrows. Easy. Thanks, babe.)

To be honest, I don't think that I have the full-fledged psychological problem (ha, that's what they all say, right??). Seriously, though, it's not a life-consuming thing for me. I don't avoid people because of this. I limit the hair-mangling to my eyebrows (ie I don't pick my scalp bald, or at all). And I don't consciously say I must pick out this specific hair. I must pull out my hair now! It's more of a self-soothe, like when people bite their nails, and I become aware of it as I'm doing it and stop. Well, I also sort of like the weird stubbly feeling of the hair underneath my fingernails. Yes, I realize this is totally, incredibly bizarre behavior, and that it is wrong, and semi-OCD. I told you, I'm crazy. Don't judge.

My mom would always say stop pulling out your eyebrows! Mr. Candy Apple has started to yell at me when I do it now, too. So, I am really, truly trying to stop this time. I mean, I am going to stop this time. I don't NEED to pick my eyebrows. It's all mental. In theory, I can stop anytime.

And although it sounds vain, I just really don't want patchy eyebrows for the wedding. You know all those lovely bridal close-ups? Yeah, patchy eyebrows wouldn't look so great in those.

{Photography by Michele M. Waite}

See?? No patches there...

So I've stopped. Cold-turkey. It has been over a month. I have only felt my fingers straying to my eyebrows a few times, and I have managed not to pick at them at all (Okay, this week has been stressful, and I sort of mangled them yesterday. Oops. Don't tell Mr. Candy Apple). I can honestly notice a difference, just from these few weeks. I read somewhere that it takes between 56-58 days for eyebrow hair to grow in after it has been plucked, so clearly, I still have a ways to go. BUT, hopefully they will continue to fill out, and I will be patch-free for the wedding! That is my goal, anyway. Must. Restrain. Self.

Did you have any bad habits that you tried to kick in the days/ weeks/ months leading up to the wedding? What strategies did you implement to help? Do you have the same weird eyebrow-picking tendencies?? (Tell me I'm not alone!!)

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